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– ## TrainingtoAvoidCommunicationBreakdowns.pdf
– ## JWI505Week2LectureNotes.pdf
– Discussion2Communications.jpeg
**## TrainingtoAvoidCommunicationBreakdowns.pdf**
Copyright of Training is the property of Lakewood Media Group LLC and its content may not
be copied or emailed to multiple sites or posted to a listserv without the copyright holder's
express written permission. However, users may print, download, or email articles for
individual use.
**## JWI505Week2LectureNotes.pdf**
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 1 of 6
Interpersonal Communication
What It Means
As a leader, you own one hundred percent of your relationships. You do not have the luxury
of waiting for other people to meet you halfway, and they are not responsible for maintaining
your relationships with them. If you want engaged colleagues and collaborators, you must
take responsibility. It is up to you to inspire, to motivate, and to build strong ties with others.
Your success depends on the strength of your relationships with your colleagues. These are
your collaborators, the people who can support your goals and help you realize them. People
will engage with you and follow you based on who you are, not just what you do. You cannot
tell others how to feel – you can only lead by example, openly and generously.
In this lecture, you will learn how to strengthen your interpersonal communication skills. We
will describe the qualities you need to demonstrate in each of your interactions, as well as
how to express yourself verbally and nonverbally. We will also explore the skill of active
listening and distinguish communication styles for different audiences.
Why It Matters
• Much of your efficacy as a leader depends on how you engage with and inspire
others.
• You can only create strong relationships when others feel that you listen to and
empathize with them.
• Leaders interact with a wide range of people and must tailor their messages
effectively.
“Empathy and social skills are social intelligence, the interpersonal part of emotional
intelligence. That’s why they look alike.”
Daniel Goleman
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 2 of 6
Interpersonal Relationships
There are four elements to any communicative action. There is always a subject, or someone
performing the communication. There is a listener, or someone receiving the communication.
There is a message, information that the subject wants to convey to the listener. And finally,
there is a means of delivery – the tools the subject uses to send their message.
As a subject, both your message and your means of delivery rely heavily on your relationship
with your listener. And whether you work in a massive corporation or a startup out of your
garage, you will invariably have to interact with people. Perhaps your listener is a customer
that you hope will buy your product or service. Maybe they are a coworker whose insights you
need to complete a project. In any case, you cannot simply send a message and hope they
act on it. If you want the listener to accept your message, they need to want to listen to you.
You have to give them a reason to want to listen. That may be easy to do with a colleague
that you have known for years. It is a lot harder to accomplish with a new coworker that you
have never met before.
Regardless of who your listener is, you have to find a way to engage them. You need to
establish trust between the two of you. You need to let them know you value their input and
response. In short, you need to empathize with them.
Enhancing Your Empathy
In the business world, empathy is often considered a “soft skill.” It is the ability to see and to
feel what another person is experiencing from their perspective. Please note that empathy is
not the same as sympathy. Sympathy simply entails acknowledging someone else’s feelings.
Empathy involves actually taking on those feelings. As PureMatter CEO Bryan Kramer puts it,
“Instead of feeling with someone, you’re feeling for them. You’re experiencing a fraction of
their emotions and feelings because you see things from their perspective.”1
1 Bryan Kramer, “The Critical Difference between Sympathy and Empathy,” Forbes, August 13, 2018,
https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2018/08/13/the-critical-difference-between-sympathy-and-
empathy/#616a6a6d16a3.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 3 of 6
Empathy is a critical addition to your leadership skillset. When you connect with someone and
really understand their feelings and perspectives, you increase their relationship buy-in. They
will want to work with you and to accomplish a shared goal. To use Jack’s phrase, that is how
you get “every brain in the game.” Empathy is also important for handling more difficult
conversations. If you recognize the source of someone’s emotions, you can relate to them
more easily. You better understand what discourages them and what motivates them. You
implicitly validate their feelings. Empathy, when you use it well, engenders respect.
The importance of empathy cannot be overstated, but we do not see it as often as we should.
Businessolver, a benefits technology company, conducts an annual State of Workplace
Empathy study. Through polling, the company evaluates how empathetic American
businesses are. In their 2019 report, 92% of CEOs surveyed said their organizations were
empathetic. Only 72% of employees agreed.2 Think about it and be honest with yourself. How
often do you feel as if your supervisor actively listens to you? Conversely, if you are a
supervisor, how often do you demonstrate that you appreciate your employees’ input?
Whether or not the leaders and managers at your company are empathetic plays a major role
in determining the amount of time and effort employees put into their work. It can even
determine whether employees stay with your company at all!
It is up to you, as both a communicator and a listener, to ensure that your interactions are
empathetic. Fortunately, there is a plethora of verbal and nonverbal techniques you can use
to connect more effectively with your colleagues and customers.
Speaking with Empathy
The key to communicating empathetically is remembering that communication is not – and
cannot be – just about you. Your message needs to be relevant to both you and your listener.
There are simple methods that will persuade your listener to invest in the message. One very
subtle trick is to avoid using first person singular pronouns, such as “me” and “my.” Telling
2 Rae Shanahan, “The 2019 State of Workplace Empathy Study: the Competitive Edge Leaders Are Missing,”
Businessolver, March 28, 2019, https://blog.businessolver.com/the-2019-state-of-workplace-empathy-study-the-
competitive-edge-leaders-are-missing.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 4 of 6
someone, “I need to organize last month’s invoices” is not a productive way to communicate.
That sentence only highlights your own needs. Your listener is left asking themselves, “So
what?” Telling someone, “We need to organize last month’s invoices” is much more
collaborative. It indicates that organizing last month’s invoices is a shared goal that is both
your responsibility and theirs.
Your listener will be more inclined to receive your message if they feel that they can talk with
you. This is where your social skills come into play. Find quick moments during the day to
interact with people. This includes arriving early for meetings and never discounting the value
of water cooler talk. This shows others you are not “too busy” to talk with them. And if you are
a supervisor and you have an “open door” policy, make sure your office door is actually open!
Conversations should never just be about yourself. Demonstrate your curiosity about your
listener by asking lots of questions. Try not to ask closed questions to which there are limited
answers. The question, “Did you like the boss’s presentation?” really only has two answers,
neither of which are terribly insightful. Definitely avoid asking leading questions which imply
an answer. When you say, “You did not like the boss’s presentation, did you?” you
subliminally force the listener to answer in a way they may not agree with. “How was the
boss’s presentation?” is a better question, but the listener does not have to give a detailed or
thoughtful answer; they can just say, “It was good.” Instead, ask a more complex question
that forces the listener to think and give you a thoughtful answer. A question like, “What was
your favorite part of the boss’s presentation?” would be a great example.
The words you use matter when talking to someone, but so does your body language. Your
listener will be more receptive if you come across as open, welcoming, curious, and
appreciative. Look the other person in the eye at all times. This shows that you value their
response. Stand close to your listener, but not too close. You want to show them that their
presence is important, while still respecting their personal space. Do not cross your arms.
This stance “shuts you off” and makes you look forbidding. As we mentioned in last week’s
lecture, never look at your phone while talking to someone face to face. And unless you are
delivering seriously bad news, maintain a relaxed smile.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 5 of 6
Listening with Empathy
Good communication is not just about imparting information. It is about receiving information,
too. Conveying your message effectively is certainly important. But it is equally important to
listen when the other person talks. When they feel heard, they are more receptive to your
message, more likely to build rapport with you, and more likely to become an active ally in
addressing the issues at hand. Both you and your listener can thus exchange information and
arrive at a collaborative solution. In his TEDx Talk “The Power of Listening,” negotiations
expert William Ury says that listening “… may be the cheapest concession we can make in a
negotiation. It costs us nothing, and it brings huge benefits. Listening may be the golden key
that opens the door to human relationship.”3
Remember, though, that there is a big difference between listening to someone and hearing
them. When you hear someone, all you do is acknowledge that they are talking. You do not
force yourself to be present, and neither of you truly connects with the other. If you have a
conversation with someone, and you cannot remember exactly what they said five minutes
later, you heard them, but you did not actually listen in an attentive way.
Properly listening to someone requires more than mere acknowledgement, and it takes
practice. You should absorb what they say, while gleaning new information and finding ways
to relate to them. Never assume you already know or understand what the other person is
saying. The next time someone is talking to you, periodically respond with what you think they
are saying. This is useful for two reasons. First, it gives the other person an opportunity to
confirm your understanding or correct it if needed. Second, it demonstrates that you are
making an effort to understand them. It shows that you are present and that you value them.
When you listen, the other person should do most of the talking. This means a lot of your
responsive communication will be nonverbal. Looking the other person directly in the eye
helps demonstrate that you are present, as does refraining from fidgeting with your hands,
clothes, or office supplies. Make a conscious effort not to seem imposing. Stand or sit close to
the other person, instead of standing on the other side of the room or sitting behind a big
3 TEDx Talks, “The Power of Listening | William Ury | TEDxSanDiego,” YouTube, January 7, 2015,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saXfavo1OQo&feature=emb_logo.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 6 of 6
desk. These steps are particularly important if you are a supervisor talking to one of your
employees. Psychologist Dolly Chugh explains that: “… when you are in a low-power role,
you are really good at reading nonverbal cues, remembering more of what was said, being
attentive, because you have more of a need from a survival standpoint.”4 So, if you are a
leader, your position of authority may reduce the impetus to be attentive, but it is important to
make a conscious effort to do so. Remember that your listening skills should make the other
person feel empowered, not disparaged or endangered.
Looking Ahead
In this lecture, we explored the importance of effective interpersonal communication in business.
We learned why empathy is such a critical component of your communications, as well as how
to demonstrate it when you speak and listen. Every interaction you have is an opportunity to
connect with others. Being authentic and present will build strong relationships and inspire your
colleagues. Everyone in your team or your company will be better positioned to win.
In the next lecture, we will explore the foundations of intercultural communication. We will delve
into the components of culture, as well as the cultural variables people exhibit in their behavior
at work. We will also enhance our understanding of how to communicate with colleagues from
different backgrounds and cultures.
4 Businessolver, “Rewards Multiply with Workplace Empathy,” The Washington Post, n.d.,
https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/brand-connect/businessolver/rewards-multiply-with-workplace-empathy/.
**Discussion2Communications.jpeg**
This file is too large to display. [View in new window](https://www.sweetstudy.com/files/discussion2communications-jpeg)
**Discussion2Communications.jpeg**
This file is too large to display. [View in new window](https://www.sweetstudy.com/files/discussion2communications-jpeg)
**## TrainingtoAvoidCommunicationBreakdowns.pdf**
Copyright of Training is the property of Lakewood Media Group LLC and its content may not
be copied or emailed to multiple sites or posted to a listserv without the copyright holder's
express written permission. However, users may print, download, or email articles for
individual use.
**## JWI505Week2LectureNotes.pdf**
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 1 of 6
Interpersonal Communication
What It Means
As a leader, you own one hundred percent of your relationships. You do not have the luxury
of waiting for other people to meet you halfway, and they are not responsible for maintaining
your relationships with them. If you want engaged colleagues and collaborators, you must
take responsibility. It is up to you to inspire, to motivate, and to build strong ties with others.
Your success depends on the strength of your relationships with your colleagues. These are
your collaborators, the people who can support your goals and help you realize them. People
will engage with you and follow you based on who you are, not just what you do. You cannot
tell others how to feel – you can only lead by example, openly and generously.
In this lecture, you will learn how to strengthen your interpersonal communication skills. We
will describe the qualities you need to demonstrate in each of your interactions, as well as
how to express yourself verbally and nonverbally. We will also explore the skill of active
listening and distinguish communication styles for different audiences.
Why It Matters
• Much of your efficacy as a leader depends on how you engage with and inspire
others.
• You can only create strong relationships when others feel that you listen to and
empathize with them.
• Leaders interact with a wide range of people and must tailor their messages
effectively.
“Empathy and social skills are social intelligence, the interpersonal part of emotional
intelligence. That’s why they look alike.”
Daniel Goleman
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 2 of 6
Interpersonal Relationships
There are four elements to any communicative action. There is always a subject, or someone
performing the communication. There is a listener, or someone receiving the communication.
There is a message, information that the subject wants to convey to the listener. And finally,
there is a means of delivery – the tools the subject uses to send their message.
As a subject, both your message and your means of delivery rely heavily on your relationship
with your listener. And whether you work in a massive corporation or a startup out of your
garage, you will invariably have to interact with people. Perhaps your listener is a customer
that you hope will buy your product or service. Maybe they are a coworker whose insights you
need to complete a project. In any case, you cannot simply send a message and hope they
act on it. If you want the listener to accept your message, they need to want to listen to you.
You have to give them a reason to want to listen. That may be easy to do with a colleague
that you have known for years. It is a lot harder to accomplish with a new coworker that you
have never met before.
Regardless of who your listener is, you have to find a way to engage them. You need to
establish trust between the two of you. You need to let them know you value their input and
response. In short, you need to empathize with them.
Enhancing Your Empathy
In the business world, empathy is often considered a “soft skill.” It is the ability to see and to
feel what another person is experiencing from their perspective. Please note that empathy is
not the same as sympathy. Sympathy simply entails acknowledging someone else’s feelings.
Empathy involves actually taking on those feelings. As PureMatter CEO Bryan Kramer puts it,
“Instead of feeling with someone, you’re feeling for them. You’re experiencing a fraction of
their emotions and feelings because you see things from their perspective.”1
1 Bryan Kramer, “The Critical Difference between Sympathy and Empathy,” Forbes, August 13, 2018,
https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2018/08/13/the-critical-difference-between-sympathy-and-
empathy/#616a6a6d16a3.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 3 of 6
Empathy is a critical addition to your leadership skillset. When you connect with someone and
really understand their feelings and perspectives, you increase their relationship buy-in. They
will want to work with you and to accomplish a shared goal. To use Jack’s phrase, that is how
you get “every brain in the game.” Empathy is also important for handling more difficult
conversations. If you recognize the source of someone’s emotions, you can relate to them
more easily. You better understand what discourages them and what motivates them. You
implicitly validate their feelings. Empathy, when you use it well, engenders respect.
The importance of empathy cannot be overstated, but we do not see it as often as we should.
Businessolver, a benefits technology company, conducts an annual State of Workplace
Empathy study. Through polling, the company evaluates how empathetic American
businesses are. In their 2019 report, 92% of CEOs surveyed said their organizations were
empathetic. Only 72% of employees agreed.2 Think about it and be honest with yourself. How
often do you feel as if your supervisor actively listens to you? Conversely, if you are a
supervisor, how often do you demonstrate that you appreciate your employees’ input?
Whether or not the leaders and managers at your company are empathetic plays a major role
in determining the amount of time and effort employees put into their work. It can even
determine whether employees stay with your company at all!
It is up to you, as both a communicator and a listener, to ensure that your interactions are
empathetic. Fortunately, there is a plethora of verbal and nonverbal techniques you can use
to connect more effectively with your colleagues and customers.
Speaking with Empathy
The key to communicating empathetically is remembering that communication is not – and
cannot be – just about you. Your message needs to be relevant to both you and your listener.
There are simple methods that will persuade your listener to invest in the message. One very
subtle trick is to avoid using first person singular pronouns, such as “me” and “my.” Telling
2 Rae Shanahan, “The 2019 State of Workplace Empathy Study: the Competitive Edge Leaders Are Missing,”
Businessolver, March 28, 2019, https://blog.businessolver.com/the-2019-state-of-workplace-empathy-study-the-
competitive-edge-leaders-are-missing.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 4 of 6
someone, “I need to organize last month’s invoices” is not a productive way to communicate.
That sentence only highlights your own needs. Your listener is left asking themselves, “So
what?” Telling someone, “We need to organize last month’s invoices” is much more
collaborative. It indicates that organizing last month’s invoices is a shared goal that is both
your responsibility and theirs.
Your listener will be more inclined to receive your message if they feel that they can talk with
you. This is where your social skills come into play. Find quick moments during the day to
interact with people. This includes arriving early for meetings and never discounting the value
of water cooler talk. This shows others you are not “too busy” to talk with them. And if you are
a supervisor and you have an “open door” policy, make sure your office door is actually open!
Conversations should never just be about yourself. Demonstrate your curiosity about your
listener by asking lots of questions. Try not to ask closed questions to which there are limited
answers. The question, “Did you like the boss’s presentation?” really only has two answers,
neither of which are terribly insightful. Definitely avoid asking leading questions which imply
an answer. When you say, “You did not like the boss’s presentation, did you?” you
subliminally force the listener to answer in a way they may not agree with. “How was the
boss’s presentation?” is a better question, but the listener does not have to give a detailed or
thoughtful answer; they can just say, “It was good.” Instead, ask a more complex question
that forces the listener to think and give you a thoughtful answer. A question like, “What was
your favorite part of the boss’s presentation?” would be a great example.
The words you use matter when talking to someone, but so does your body language. Your
listener will be more receptive if you come across as open, welcoming, curious, and
appreciative. Look the other person in the eye at all times. This shows that you value their
response. Stand close to your listener, but not too close. You want to show them that their
presence is important, while still respecting their personal space. Do not cross your arms.
This stance “shuts you off” and makes you look forbidding. As we mentioned in last week’s
lecture, never look at your phone while talking to someone face to face. And unless you are
delivering seriously bad news, maintain a relaxed smile.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 5 of 6
Listening with Empathy
Good communication is not just about imparting information. It is about receiving information,
too. Conveying your message effectively is certainly important. But it is equally important to
listen when the other person talks. When they feel heard, they are more receptive to your
message, more likely to build rapport with you, and more likely to become an active ally in
addressing the issues at hand. Both you and your listener can thus exchange information and
arrive at a collaborative solution. In his TEDx Talk “The Power of Listening,” negotiations
expert William Ury says that listening “… may be the cheapest concession we can make in a
negotiation. It costs us nothing, and it brings huge benefits. Listening may be the golden key
that opens the door to human relationship.”3
Remember, though, that there is a big difference between listening to someone and hearing
them. When you hear someone, all you do is acknowledge that they are talking. You do not
force yourself to be present, and neither of you truly connects with the other. If you have a
conversation with someone, and you cannot remember exactly what they said five minutes
later, you heard them, but you did not actually listen in an attentive way.
Properly listening to someone requires more than mere acknowledgement, and it takes
practice. You should absorb what they say, while gleaning new information and finding ways
to relate to them. Never assume you already know or understand what the other person is
saying. The next time someone is talking to you, periodically respond with what you think they
are saying. This is useful for two reasons. First, it gives the other person an opportunity to
confirm your understanding or correct it if needed. Second, it demonstrates that you are
making an effort to understand them. It shows that you are present and that you value them.
When you listen, the other person should do most of the talking. This means a lot of your
responsive communication will be nonverbal. Looking the other person directly in the eye
helps demonstrate that you are present, as does refraining from fidgeting with your hands,
clothes, or office supplies. Make a conscious effort not to seem imposing. Stand or sit close to
the other person, instead of standing on the other side of the room or sitting behind a big
3 TEDx Talks, “The Power of Listening | William Ury | TEDxSanDiego,” YouTube, January 7, 2015,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saXfavo1OQo&feature=emb_logo.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 6 of 6
desk. These steps are particularly important if you are a supervisor talking to one of your
employees. Psychologist Dolly Chugh explains that: “… when you are in a low-power role,
you are really good at reading nonverbal cues, remembering more of what was said, being
attentive, because you have more of a need from a survival standpoint.”4 So, if you are a
leader, your position of authority may reduce the impetus to be attentive, but it is important to
make a conscious effort to do so. Remember that your listening skills should make the other
person feel empowered, not disparaged or endangered.
Looking Ahead
In this lecture, we explored the importance of effective interpersonal communication in business.
We learned why empathy is such a critical component of your communications, as well as how
to demonstrate it when you speak and listen. Every interaction you have is an opportunity to
connect with others. Being authentic and present will build strong relationships and inspire your
colleagues. Everyone in your team or your company will be better positioned to win.
In the next lecture, we will explore the foundations of intercultural communication. We will delve
into the components of culture, as well as the cultural variables people exhibit in their behavior
at work. We will also enhance our understanding of how to communicate with colleagues from
different backgrounds and cultures.
4 Businessolver, “Rewards Multiply with Workplace Empathy,” The Washington Post, n.d.,
https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/brand-connect/businessolver/rewards-multiply-with-workplace-empathy/.
**Discussion2Communications.jpeg**
This file is too large to display. [View in new window](https://www.sweetstudy.com/files/discussion2communications-jpeg)
**## TrainingtoAvoidCommunicationBreakdowns.pdf**
Copyright of Training is the property of Lakewood Media Group LLC and its content may not
be copied or emailed to multiple sites or posted to a listserv without the copyright holder's
express written permission. However, users may print, download, or email articles for
individual use.
**## JWI505Week2LectureNotes.pdf**
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 1 of 6
Interpersonal Communication
What It Means
As a leader, you own one hundred percent of your relationships. You do not have the luxury
of waiting for other people to meet you halfway, and they are not responsible for maintaining
your relationships with them. If you want engaged colleagues and collaborators, you must
take responsibility. It is up to you to inspire, to motivate, and to build strong ties with others.
Your success depends on the strength of your relationships with your colleagues. These are
your collaborators, the people who can support your goals and help you realize them. People
will engage with you and follow you based on who you are, not just what you do. You cannot
tell others how to feel – you can only lead by example, openly and generously.
In this lecture, you will learn how to strengthen your interpersonal communication skills. We
will describe the qualities you need to demonstrate in each of your interactions, as well as
how to express yourself verbally and nonverbally. We will also explore the skill of active
listening and distinguish communication styles for different audiences.
Why It Matters
• Much of your efficacy as a leader depends on how you engage with and inspire
others.
• You can only create strong relationships when others feel that you listen to and
empathize with them.
• Leaders interact with a wide range of people and must tailor their messages
effectively.
“Empathy and social skills are social intelligence, the interpersonal part of emotional
intelligence. That’s why they look alike.”
Daniel Goleman
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
© Strayer University. All Rights Reserved. This document contains Strayer University confidential and proprietary information and may not be
copied, further distributed, or otherwise disclosed, in whole or in part, without the expressed written permission of Strayer University.
JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 2 of 6
Interpersonal Relationships
There are four elements to any communicative action. There is always a subject, or someone
performing the communication. There is a listener, or someone receiving the communication.
There is a message, information that the subject wants to convey to the listener. And finally,
there is a means of delivery – the tools the subject uses to send their message.
As a subject, both your message and your means of delivery rely heavily on your relationship
with your listener. And whether you work in a massive corporation or a startup out of your
garage, you will invariably have to interact with people. Perhaps your listener is a customer
that you hope will buy your product or service. Maybe they are a coworker whose insights you
need to complete a project. In any case, you cannot simply send a message and hope they
act on it. If you want the listener to accept your message, they need to want to listen to you.
You have to give them a reason to want to listen. That may be easy to do with a colleague
that you have known for years. It is a lot harder to accomplish with a new coworker that you
have never met before.
Regardless of who your listener is, you have to find a way to engage them. You need to
establish trust between the two of you. You need to let them know you value their input and
response. In short, you need to empathize with them.
Enhancing Your Empathy
In the business world, empathy is often considered a “soft skill.” It is the ability to see and to
feel what another person is experiencing from their perspective. Please note that empathy is
not the same as sympathy. Sympathy simply entails acknowledging someone else’s feelings.
Empathy involves actually taking on those feelings. As PureMatter CEO Bryan Kramer puts it,
“Instead of feeling with someone, you’re feeling for them. You’re experiencing a fraction of
their emotions and feelings because you see things from their perspective.”1
1 Bryan Kramer, “The Critical Difference between Sympathy and Empathy,” Forbes, August 13, 2018,
https://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/2018/08/13/the-critical-difference-between-sympathy-and-
empathy/#616a6a6d16a3.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
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JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 3 of 6
Empathy is a critical addition to your leadership skillset. When you connect with someone and
really understand their feelings and perspectives, you increase their relationship buy-in. They
will want to work with you and to accomplish a shared goal. To use Jack’s phrase, that is how
you get “every brain in the game.” Empathy is also important for handling more difficult
conversations. If you recognize the source of someone’s emotions, you can relate to them
more easily. You better understand what discourages them and what motivates them. You
implicitly validate their feelings. Empathy, when you use it well, engenders respect.
The importance of empathy cannot be overstated, but we do not see it as often as we should.
Businessolver, a benefits technology company, conducts an annual State of Workplace
Empathy study. Through polling, the company evaluates how empathetic American
businesses are. In their 2019 report, 92% of CEOs surveyed said their organizations were
empathetic. Only 72% of employees agreed.2 Think about it and be honest with yourself. How
often do you feel as if your supervisor actively listens to you? Conversely, if you are a
supervisor, how often do you demonstrate that you appreciate your employees’ input?
Whether or not the leaders and managers at your company are empathetic plays a major role
in determining the amount of time and effort employees put into their work. It can even
determine whether employees stay with your company at all!
It is up to you, as both a communicator and a listener, to ensure that your interactions are
empathetic. Fortunately, there is a plethora of verbal and nonverbal techniques you can use
to connect more effectively with your colleagues and customers.
Speaking with Empathy
The key to communicating empathetically is remembering that communication is not – and
cannot be – just about you. Your message needs to be relevant to both you and your listener.
There are simple methods that will persuade your listener to invest in the message. One very
subtle trick is to avoid using first person singular pronouns, such as “me” and “my.” Telling
2 Rae Shanahan, “The 2019 State of Workplace Empathy Study: the Competitive Edge Leaders Are Missing,”
Businessolver, March 28, 2019, https://blog.businessolver.com/the-2019-state-of-workplace-empathy-study-the-
competitive-edge-leaders-are-missing.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
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JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 4 of 6
someone, “I need to organize last month’s invoices” is not a productive way to communicate.
That sentence only highlights your own needs. Your listener is left asking themselves, “So
what?” Telling someone, “We need to organize last month’s invoices” is much more
collaborative. It indicates that organizing last month’s invoices is a shared goal that is both
your responsibility and theirs.
Your listener will be more inclined to receive your message if they feel that they can talk with
you. This is where your social skills come into play. Find quick moments during the day to
interact with people. This includes arriving early for meetings and never discounting the value
of water cooler talk. This shows others you are not “too busy” to talk with them. And if you are
a supervisor and you have an “open door” policy, make sure your office door is actually open!
Conversations should never just be about yourself. Demonstrate your curiosity about your
listener by asking lots of questions. Try not to ask closed questions to which there are limited
answers. The question, “Did you like the boss’s presentation?” really only has two answers,
neither of which are terribly insightful. Definitely avoid asking leading questions which imply
an answer. When you say, “You did not like the boss’s presentation, did you?” you
subliminally force the listener to answer in a way they may not agree with. “How was the
boss’s presentation?” is a better question, but the listener does not have to give a detailed or
thoughtful answer; they can just say, “It was good.” Instead, ask a more complex question
that forces the listener to think and give you a thoughtful answer. A question like, “What was
your favorite part of the boss’s presentation?” would be a great example.
The words you use matter when talking to someone, but so does your body language. Your
listener will be more receptive if you come across as open, welcoming, curious, and
appreciative. Look the other person in the eye at all times. This shows that you value their
response. Stand close to your listener, but not too close. You want to show them that their
presence is important, while still respecting their personal space. Do not cross your arms.
This stance “shuts you off” and makes you look forbidding. As we mentioned in last week’s
lecture, never look at your phone while talking to someone face to face. And unless you are
delivering seriously bad news, maintain a relaxed smile.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
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JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 5 of 6
Listening with Empathy
Good communication is not just about imparting information. It is about receiving information,
too. Conveying your message effectively is certainly important. But it is equally important to
listen when the other person talks. When they feel heard, they are more receptive to your
message, more likely to build rapport with you, and more likely to become an active ally in
addressing the issues at hand. Both you and your listener can thus exchange information and
arrive at a collaborative solution. In his TEDx Talk “The Power of Listening,” negotiations
expert William Ury says that listening “… may be the cheapest concession we can make in a
negotiation. It costs us nothing, and it brings huge benefits. Listening may be the golden key
that opens the door to human relationship.”3
Remember, though, that there is a big difference between listening to someone and hearing
them. When you hear someone, all you do is acknowledge that they are talking. You do not
force yourself to be present, and neither of you truly connects with the other. If you have a
conversation with someone, and you cannot remember exactly what they said five minutes
later, you heard them, but you did not actually listen in an attentive way.
Properly listening to someone requires more than mere acknowledgement, and it takes
practice. You should absorb what they say, while gleaning new information and finding ways
to relate to them. Never assume you already know or understand what the other person is
saying. The next time someone is talking to you, periodically respond with what you think they
are saying. This is useful for two reasons. First, it gives the other person an opportunity to
confirm your understanding or correct it if needed. Second, it demonstrates that you are
making an effort to understand them. It shows that you are present and that you value them.
When you listen, the other person should do most of the talking. This means a lot of your
responsive communication will be nonverbal. Looking the other person directly in the eye
helps demonstrate that you are present, as does refraining from fidgeting with your hands,
clothes, or office supplies. Make a conscious effort not to seem imposing. Stand or sit close to
the other person, instead of standing on the other side of the room or sitting behind a big
3 TEDx Talks, “The Power of Listening | William Ury | TEDxSanDiego,” YouTube, January 7, 2015,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saXfavo1OQo&feature=emb_logo.
JWI 505: Business Communications and Executive Presence
Week 2 Lecture Notes
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JWI 505 – Lecture Notes (1206) Page 6 of 6
desk. These steps are particularly important if you are a supervisor talking to one of your
employees. Psychologist Dolly Chugh explains that: “… when you are in a low-power role,
you are really good at reading nonverbal cues, remembering more of what was said, being
attentive, because you have more of a need from a survival standpoint.”4 So, if you are a
leader, your position of authority may reduce the impetus to be attentive, but it is important to
make a conscious effort to do so. Remember that your listening skills should make the other
person feel empowered, not disparaged or endangered.
Looking Ahead
In this lecture, we explored the importance of effective interpersonal communication in business.
We learned why empathy is such a critical component of your communications, as well as how
to demonstrate it when you speak and listen. Every interaction you have is an opportunity to
connect with others. Being authentic and present will build strong relationships and inspire your
colleagues. Everyone in your team or your company will be better positioned to win.
In the next lecture, we will explore the foundations of intercultural communication. We will delve
into the components of culture, as well as the cultural variables people exhibit in their behavior
at work. We will also enhance our understanding of how to communicate with colleagues from
different backgrounds and cultures.
4 Businessolver, “Rewards Multiply with Workplace Empathy,” The Washington Post, n.d.,
https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/brand-connect/businessolver/rewards-multiply-with-workplace-empathy/.
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